


fuck what do you call fics

by orphan_account



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Help, MysticMessenger, i am simply being self indulgent, i dont even fucking know where im gonna go witj this have fun, i dont know what the fuck im doing, i guess?, i was gonna make this abo but i changed my mind, mc is technically a self insert, um how do you tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:55:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24136957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: fuck you all im being self indulgent so um mysmess but its nor in a chatroom and the rfa ismt real and all the canon isnt where im at its normal world no rfa for me i tjink also i am bad eith names i eill simply change it when i think of one anyways self indulgence slaps yall dont gotta read this one i dont even know where im gonna go with this
Relationships: Zen | Ryu Hyun/Main Character, Zen | Ryu Hyun/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 3





	fuck what do you call fics

It was the last place she expected to run into someone like him. Not mainstream, but known by enough people to attract a little unwanted attention. Luckily for the both of you this was somewhere with very few people, the sparse numbers slowly dwindling as every minute passing. Out of everywhere the last place she thought she'd ever meet him was,, here!?! A media museum?? She thought that it could maybe make sense considering he acted but out of everywhere this seemed so out of,, character? for him?. She didn't even know if she should speak out, tell him you recognise him; would it make her seem like one of *those* fans to say anything to him??

While she spent a couple more minutes pondering approaching him while he was in a regular close to empty space as opposed to some busy area which would only bring attention, an announcement began to play through a tannoy located somewhere in the roof. 

"This building is now closing, may all visitors please proceed to the exits located around the building. Thank you."

Her head began to fill with regrets, how long had she spent contemplating talking to this man, who probably isnt even worth it (she's heard he's a narcissist and considering the way he looks you can't just dismiss that, the body, the clothing style, the way he asserts himself in interviews, the way his FACE looks,,). She curses herself maybe a little louder than she thought, should've just have the courage to introduce yourself to him, he didn't have to know you once had him as your lockscreen, oh no why did you have to remember that, that you once would've dropped dead right there on the spot even just hearing his voice let alone being a few feet away from him. You had pulled an idiotic move, your younger self is YELLING at you right now. You couldn't even have just said hi, huh?

You can feel him staring at you, maybe awaiting a response, maybe recognition- you are in the age range for his fanbase after all.

After a couple of minutes of the rhetoric spinning around your head like clothes on a spin wash, a voice pulls you out of your close to trance,, a male voice,, one you recognise from your fangirl days. Zen himself had addressed you and you barely registered the words. You want to bash your head into the wall, there's no way to get around this without asking him to repeat himself. 

Ashamed, she quietly asked him what he said, made up some cheap obvious lie about why she didn't hear what he said. She could feel her cheeks burning with such nervous shame, this isnt how she ever thought she'd encounter the man who was once her idol. Her younger self moved to this particular city because her younger self was lonely and had the free time to find out where people she adored lived. She shouldn't have been so dumb as to follow through with it, yet she did and YET AGAIN didn't hear what he said. She didn't want to have to ask him to repeat himself again he was clearly getting annoyed with the large amount of time she was taking to respond. Alas, she simply turned and walked away, towards the exit, slowly whisper yelling at herself for the humiliation and shame coursing through her body right now this moment. She would have to refrain from coming back here again unfortunately if this is the awfulness she is subjected to. She pulls out her phone and opens up the reminders app: Do NOT go back to any museums around this area SPECIFICALLY the artsy ones. She just hoped this wouldn't be a common occurrence, that it would simply be a one time mistake, that's all but thats all it ever could be, what are the chances of two run-ins with someone like that.

Her body rang with pain caused by self resentment and humiliation and embarrassment and whatever other synonyms she failed to think of at this moment in time as she walked out of the building, hoping for this moment to never happen again. Ahah how she wishes she'd have chosed a different city to make her home. Time spent dwelling on regrets never helps anything, she knows this yet,, she's fully away she's constantly gonna relive this stupid stupid moment every waking moment of her life with younger her featuring as commentry with such hits as: 'why would you do that you stupid whore', 'you never get things right why would this have been the time you finally did' and 'you are so dumb i cant believe we devolved'. She decided the best way to get her stupid internal narrator to quiet down was to go to the local cafe instead. The woman that owns it is nice, her food was godly. What she would do for one of her handmade cakes,,, She was dwelling again. No the right thing to do is to go home, maybe eat some late dinner, and lie in bed staring at the darkened ceiling while regretting being born because of that one AVOIDABLE moment that happened today. She just wanted to fling her head into her obnoxiously large body pillow she had kept throughout the years (she regrets the choice of pillowcase she made greatly but its not the time for this now) and just simply scream, scream out all the physical pain that one stupid simple interaction had caused her. She thinks that would help greatly. Maybe not but it's the best helper as of right now. She hoped she wouldn't have to relive this ever again like it ever could, like he'd even try again when it seemed like she had blatantly ignored him. OH GOD DID I COME ACROSS AS RUDE. The thought kept racing through your head, how did you react facially, what expressions did you form, PLEASE TELL ME THEY WERENT ANYTHING AWFUL I COULDNT STAND THAT. Her brain began yelling, the 16 year old self screeching at her for ruining her only want in life. Too much at once this is all, too much at one, she should've left before she realised it was him. That would've meant she avoided this, the whole internal conflict which was slowly eating away at her. She didn't have the tendency to dwell on most things like this, but she had no clue why this one stood out to her. 

Another time for all of the smorgasbord of conflicting thoughts racing through her head as she approached her home. It was a small one bedroomed place, small in a cosy sense. It helped that it was the sole one she could afford. The neighbourhood was something of a dream and the fact that it was close enough to anywhere major,, but that came at a high price. It was however, a sacrifice she was more than willing to make if it meant she could live in a place with so much opportunity surrounding her. And the view,, mmmm she hadnt known a night-sky like it ever. Everytime the largest stars stood out sparkling and shining, there wasnt even a need for lights,, the gas balls providing all necessary lighting. It could be almost,, romantic to some. She had quickly ignored that when she first came to the thought, she had simply been lonely most of her life and she was fine with no one close to her now. It was what she had grown used to over the years. She wasn't sure why people hadn't had the courtesy to entertain the idea of friendship with her but that was the past. She was comfortable with no people around, the one drawback being stuff like THAT was unfortunately a common occurrence.


End file.
